>Register now for Being Powerful In Any Team, Feb. 17-19
http://www.beingpowerful.com/
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Welcome to Partnerwerks TeamWisdom Tips!
by Christopher M. Avery, Ph.D. (http://www.partnerwerks.com)
December 20, 2002
Read by 3185 professionals in 48 countries.
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>Subscribe or unsubscribe in the last section, below.
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TeamWisdom(TM) Tips promotes individual mental skills and
behaviors that create highly responsible and productive
relationships at work.
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This week's line-up:
1. 10-Second TeamWisdom
2. Welcome Notes
3. CURRENT EVENTS: APOLOGIZING FUNDAMENTALS
4. MYTH-BUSTING PART 3 of 3
5. 5-Minute TeamWisdom Stretch
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1. 10-Second TeamWisdom
When apologizing, for your sake, do it effectively the first
time.
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2. Welcome Notes
Welcome to 60 new subscribers (so far) who attended my
ProjectWorld keynote last week.
Registrations are coming in for Being Powerful In Any Team,
February 17-19, 2003 at the beautiful Guadalupe River Ranch
near San Antonio, TX. I've committed to lead the entire
learning event. Space is limited. Learn more and register at
http://www.beingpowerful.com. Don't wait another minute!
I promised an announcement this week. It may not be that big
a deal for you, but we care!! We've completely revamped our
web site. There's a new organization, new content, new look
and feel, an updated tag line, and, Partnerwerks former
"bar-code" logo is back! Check out the new and improved site
at http://www.partnerwerks.com. Tell us what you think.
Thank you for caring enough about responsible relationships
at work to read TeamWisdom Tips. Forward this issue to
everyone you know who could be more powerful in teams.
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3. CURRENT EVENTS: APOLOGIZING FUNDAMENTALS
The radio just announced Senator Trent Lott will step down
as majority leader. Is it because of the controversial
remarks he made at Strom Thurmond's 100th birthday party? Or
is it due to his failure to apologize effectively for that
faux pas? We'll never know, but I think he would have stood
much more of a chance if he had attended to the
trust-building information in Being Powerful In Any Team or
if had read some of the TeamWisdom Tips written about
cleaning up broken agreements. Here is a lesson you can
learn from his mistake.
When you apologize, do it well and do it completely. Don't
just do it half way. It may just backfire on you. Some
people actually pay attention to the "feeling/tone" of the
message and not just check-off whether you have used the
correct word ("apology"). So, if you don't apologize well
and completely, it may not land no matter how many times you
use the words "apologize" and "sorry."
To apologize completely means to first understand and
acknowledge the mess that you made. Own that mess!
Acknowledge it. Say to yourself "I did that!" Don't behave
as if it didn't really happen, or as if you slipped (Or as
if you didn't mean it because your remarks were not
carefully prepared. Personally I believe off-the-cuff
remarks reveal more truth than prepared statements).
And never ever use that lame phrase "If you were offended."
Why? Maybe it is just me, but I always hear "if" as
condescending. "If" in an apology is a subtle move to shift
the blame from yourself, the offender, to the offended. "If"
implies others were not offended, and those who were not
offended are right-minded (like oneself), so, you who are
offended must be wrong-minded.
Get started with this week's 5-Minute Practice Tip.
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4. MYTH-BUSTING PART 3 of 3
In the last two issues, we covered Myths 1-3 in-depth. Here
they are in summary along with the remainder of the myths.
Myth #1. You must hire a consultant. (Not true. Any
professional can learn and apply basic TeamWisdom skills to
boost a group's performance by 50% to 100% or even more.)
Myth #2. The first agenda in team building is to get people
to like each other. (Nope. In fact, the first agenda is for
the people to discover what they are to accomplish
collectively as a team!)
Myth #3. Team building takes time away from real work.
(Actually, to build a team means engaging one another in
fruitful conversations about what we are doing together and
how we are going to do it.)
Myth #4. Individuals arenıt responsible for the quality of
their team experience because teamwork is a group skill.
Truth: This is a popular belief that causes even the
smartest and most highly skilled individuals to excuse their
poor performance by saying, ³I got put on a bad team.²
Individuals make a vast difference on teams and should act
on all of their personal abilities to affect their entire
teamıs performance.
Myth #5. Team membersı skills are more important than their
motivation. Truth: When teamwork is important, skills should
come after factors like drive, energy, interest, motivation,
and enthusiasm because itıs shared desire not talent that
creates teamwork. Itıs also true that low motivation is more
infectious on teams than high motivation. And while skilled
individuals act within their roles, committed team members
improvise to get the job done.
Myth #6: Team members must subordinate their self-interests
for the good of the team. Truth: Responsible team members
retain their personal power. They find a way to align their
self-interests with the team assignment, knowing that ³going
along² without passion or commitment can take the team to
where no member wants to go.
Myth #7: Team members must choose or compromise between
getting the job done and treating one another humanely.
Truth: The best teams believe that the task can get done and
that team members can have an extraordinary experience.
Myth #8: A team that starts on the right track stays on the
right track. Truth: A number of events can occur during the
life of a team to break the teamıs healthy dynamics. To stay
³built,² team members should pinpoint problems as they arise
and address them immediately.
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Buy "Teamwork Is an Individual Skill: Getting Your Work Done
When Sharing Responsibility" at
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1576751554/partnerofficeont/
"It contains more practical information and advice about the
conditions under which we humans optimize our work together
than any other book you are likely to have read"
~Terry O'Keefe, Executive Bookshelf
For 35% off orders of 50+ books contact info@partnerwerks.com
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4. 5-Minute Practice Tip
Think of the last half-apology you made. What would you do
different now?
I wish you a world of responsible and productive
relationships at work.
Faithfully,
Christopher
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development managers. When they invite me to send them a
marketing kit full of testimonial letters that will make you
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folks to the url below and cc us at teamwisdom@partnerwerks.com.
http://www.partnerwerks.com/services_and_products/speaking.html
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I will be traveling to and speaking...
- February 17-19, Being Powerful In Any Team, San Antonio,
TX (http://www.beingpowerful.com)
- March 11, Denver, CO
- May 5, PMI/NJ Chapter Regional Symposium, Edison, NJ
- May 13-15, Being Powerful In Any Team, San Antonio, TX
(http://www.beingpowerful.com)
Want me to speak at your company or association? See
http://www.partnerwerks.com/services_and_products/speaking.html
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