Are you unhappy or frustrated at work?

Have you thought this about your team:

• “I can’t be responsible for the quality of my team’s efforts.”
• “Getting on a good team is mostly a matter of luck.”
• “If I’m part of a poorly functioning team, and I’m not in charge, there is little I can do but bear it.”

These kinds of thoughts take an enormous toll — they result in lost productivity and low morale of the individual, the team, and the whole organization.

After years of studying team behavior and coaching business leaders, I can tell you that the most successful people demonstrate another set of beliefs and skills about teamwork which in my book Teamwork Is An Individual Skill I call “TeamWisdom.”

People with TeamWisdom:

• understand and act on all of their personal abilities to affect the entire team’s effectiveness
• know that being in a good team isn’t random, it’s a function of one’s relationship behavior and what they and others do
• take personal responsibility for the quality of their relationships. They never wait for those “in charge” to notice and act on a situation that needs attention

Do you want your experience at work to improve? Try this: consider your most recent team experience. Would you give yourself a high rating for your (not anyone else’s) TeamWisdom?

The quality of your participation affects the quality of the team’s results. Instead of expecting a mediocre team experience or just hoping for a better one, raise your own standards for –  and commitment to — great team performance.

Make Teamwork an Individual Skill — Start Being More Responsible For Your Own Team Experience!

1. recognize that you are not a passive recipient in teams — your behavior shapes and affects the team
2. acknowledge that not attending to team performance is a choice and that you are choosing to put yourself at the mercy of change and will most likely be frustrated with the outcome
3. accept that if you are in a situation of shared responsibility and reward, the quality and productivity of the relationships are worthy of your focus — your input matters

If you start with just these three steps, you’ll transform you experience with teamwork!

Want to learn more about how to have a more fulfilling work experience?

Christopher Avery’s book Teamwork Is An Individual Skill will teach you how to work more effectively, how to stand out from the crowd, and how to be more successful in any situation.

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When you feel obligated, you are doing something you don’t want to do but feel you have to. Feeling like you “have to” generates resentment that you either bottle up or release at unrelated or inappropriate moments, and the resentment produces unproductive or at least wasted thoughts and action.

The Responsibility Process shows us that the feelings of obligation are just a mindset. It is just one way of coping with a situation we don’t want. The good news is that you don’t have to stay in that mindset.

How to Release Feelings of “Have To”

To release yourself from obligation:

• Ask yourself: what are you doing that you don’t want to do but think you have to?
• How does that make you feel and act?
• Ask yourself what you want to get out of the situation
• Look to see what’s true that you’ve not been seeing
• What if you trusted your power and ability to respond resourcefully to move from obligation to responsibility, what might that look like?

Catching Yourself is Key

I applied these steps recently when I “had to” push some urgent work aside and accompany my sons to their activities. I caught myself grumbling internally and growling at them. When I caught myself, I stopped.

I forgave myself for being human and silently asked myself what I wanted. The answer came immediately: I had signed up for this activity (in more ways than one!) and I wanted to be a dad at that moment and enjoy my sons. The resentment vanished and I was much more responsive and available — instead of feeling badly about my obligation, I decided to live in the moment and enjoy it fully.

That was a quick release. Sometimes it’s not so easy and can take a lot longer, but the process is the same — keep intending to take responsibility, keep asking yourself what you want, and keep looking to see what’s true. The clarity will come to you if you take those actions. Your natural Responsibility Process™ works that way, flawlessly, time after time.

You can have it the way you want it — more importantly, you can want it the way you have it!

“Obligation is indeed a long way from responsibility.”
Tom DeMarco, speaking at the Cutter Summit, May 10, 2006

Learn more about Christopher Avery’s Responsibility Process

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I’ve recently added these conference dates to my calendar. Of course I’ll be speaking about some aspect of the Leadership Gift at each one. I’d love to see you there.

Agile Day 2010

When: September 15, 2010

Where: NYC, NY, USA

Organized by the NYC APLN, Agile Day 2010 will be an intimate conference of just 100 people in an exciting venue at Times Square. I’ll offer the opening keynote: Are We as Agile as We Think? Get your ticket ASAP. Website for more information.

Agile Boston Open 2010

When: September 16, 2010

Where: Boston, MA, USA

Organized by Agile Boston, Agile Boston Open 2010 features a number of amazing speakers and Open Space conveners (which is what I’ll be doing there). I look forward to hanging with my agile friends in Boston. Register very soon. Website for more information.

Agile Business Conference 2010

When: October 5-6, 2010

Where: London, England

Organized by DSDM Consortium, the Agile Business Conference is always a premier event. I look forward to returning. I’ll be offering back-to-back sessions on Demonstrating Responsibility: the Mindset of An Agile Leader, and How to Develop Your Leadership Gift Daily: An Agile Approach to Growth. How exciting. Website for more information.

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When things go well, responsibility is seldom an issue. But when that graceful state of flow turns to upset because your attention gets disrupted by a problem you didn’t anticipate or don’t want to deal with, your words reveal where your head is:

• I didn’t know that was my job!
• It’s not my fault; she did it!
• That’s just the way it is; there’s nothing I can do!
• Blame me; I’ll take the hit!
• I have to; otherwise I’ll get in trouble!
• Whatever!
• Yep, that’s my mess and here’s what I’m doing to clean it up…

Just for Fun

Match each of the seven phrases above to one of the seven positions on the Responsibility Process™ poster.

The only positive, productive response to problems in the workplace is taking Responsibility.

Responsibility Process™ Tips

First, if you want to expand your ability to respond to problems, listen for and catch yourself saying or even thinking those non-productive thoughts that everybody experiences when things go wrong.

Then, stop yourself from acting on those non-productive thoughts and tell yourself that there’s more for you to own about the situation.

Finally, examine your upset and the situation to find a new and expansive truth you can act on to move forward responsibly and resourcefully.

Reflection

Unproductive thoughts and disruptive actions can cost you dearly and cause a lot of avoidable stress at work. Which of the seven responses to upset lead to resourceful thinking and acting so that your productivity doesn’t suffer?

Want to learn more?

The Responsibility Process™ reveals how you internally explain and deal with upsets, large and small. Tap into the power of the Responsibility Process by listening to and owning your thoughts and words when you aren’t getting what you want. Download your own free Responsibility Process™ poster. And check out the Journey to Responsibility DVD-based workshop designs.

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Apparently, the world is addicted to solving the wrong problem. And when we aren’t solving the wrong problem, we are seriously overspending on overly-complex, under-performing solutions. At least according to Rory Sutherland in this compelling TED video (below, keep reading).

I’m familiar with both of these issues. Let me set up the video for you, then watch it below…

What if we’re solving the wrong problems?

Participants in the Leadership Gift program for leaders discover how most of our life we have been trying to deal with our anxiety about a problem rather than identify and address the real problem. As a painful example, if we work in a company culture of blame or rely on laying blame as a coping mechanism, and we participate in a root cause analysis, then we are likely to conclude our assessment with who was the problem.

Blaming a scapegoat temporarily relieves our anxiety, but it doesn’t find and address the real problem. The root cause remains to be found whether it is the system, process, design, information, training, or something else — like the company culture maybe.

This is a little deep, but consider it: Most of our coping strategies for dealing with problems simply address our anxiety about the problem rather than the real problem. However, when we identify and address the real problem, then we always learn and grow, becoming ever more free and powerful. I know which I prefer.

You have complete freedom of choice about how you define a problem.

Could the simplest solution really be the best?

From the agile approach to software development and project management I’ve learned that the simplest solution is often the best solution. This principle is an elegant response to a number of issues, including scope creep and over-engineering. It doesn’t actually mean to always go for the quickest fix — no not at all.

Here’s what it does mean: Examine and re-examine the goal (value) you are trying to achieve as you examine and re-examine the work (cost) you are proposing for fulfilling the goal. This is best done in dialog with others. Success is realizing the greatest value for the least cost.

My takeaway from this principle has led me to be a better buyer and a better supplier. How? Because whichever side of the conversation I am on (goal and value, or work and cost), I do my best to have an open and transparent conversation about the real value sought and the best (simplest, most direct) way to deliver that value.

Whichever side of the conversation you are on, you win by participating.

Simply solve the real problem, watch…

For Rory’s bottom right quadrant, I propose “agile” or the “Leadership Gift.” What do you think?

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